


Doctor of Death

by holy3cake



Category: Insidious (Movies), Saw (Movies)
Genre: Betrayal, Crossover, Discovery, Elise is worried, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Hopeful Ending, Lawrence is confused, Love, M/M, Mystery, Night Terrors, Specs-Orientated, Tucker is such a good friend, demon hunting, fragments
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-21
Updated: 2020-11-10
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:14:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 13,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27133018
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/holy3cake/pseuds/holy3cake
Summary: One afternoon, Elise receives a call from a very distressed Doctor. With the help of Specs and Tucker, she immediately starts an investigation. But why does Specs feel a strange connection with this doctor? It’s almost as though they’ve met before, but how?Dual Fanfic, combining Saw and Insidious. Rated M for gore and scenes of a sexual nature, readers please be advisedON HIATUS UNTIL 2021
Relationships: Adam Faulkner-Stanheight/Lawrence Gordon, Specs/Tucker (Insidious), Tucker/OC
Comments: 26
Kudos: 18





	1. The Call

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! This is my first attempt at combining two of my absolute favourite fandoms, I’m not sure if I made it work lol but just a little timeline so it doesn’t get confusing. This is set after Insidious 3&4, but before the Lambert family starting experiencing paranormal activity. It is also set after the Saw movies, so Lawrence is living alone. Hope that helps! Please let me know if there’s any discrepancies, and enjoy!

After calling out into the darkness, Elise was exhausted. Every night, she wondered if she’d hear voices again, interrupting her once peaceful sleep. It wasn’t easy being able to have such a gift, but she knew it had to be used for good, to save others. It wasn’t so bad since she’d met Specs and Tucker, she loved them so much that she would do anything to have them by her side, even if it meant she had to deceive them. But that was her secret, and it would continue to plague her until one call would knock her plan out of action. That call would come a lot sooner than she realized.

***

“Jesus Christ Tucker, do you have to eat that shit in here? The whole van stinks.” Specs held his nose as Tucker brought three big macs into their van. It was a sunny day, and without any cases to work on, they’d decided to drive into town and relax at lunch time. But as usual, Tucker was trying Specs’ limits by purchasing the smelliest food he could think of.

“Aw come on, I got you something.” Tucker rummaged in the brown bag and pulled out a box of chicken nuggets, tossing them onto Specs lap as he grinned at him, devouring one of his burgers.

“Hey, do you think Elise is okay? She seemed…..I don’t know? Tired?” Specs suddenly asked, unclipping his seatbelt as he leaned away from the steering wheel to eat.

“She’ll be okay. She’s got us.” Tucker nudged him in the ribs and smiled softly, making Specs roll his eyes a little at the burger sauce dripping all over the handbrake due to Tucker’s carelessness when he poked him. As he started nibbling a nugget, he stared out of the window and sighed deeply. Tucker would always reassure him that Elise was just fine, but he knew she wasn’t. Perhaps it was because they saw her as a mother, or because she had a particular protective nature, but Specs couldn’t shake the looming dread in the pit of his stomach. It wasn’t the usual feeling, of fearing the next demon they could encounter. It was an odd sense of belonging, or perhaps that he didn’t belong. Elise had done so much for him, when he lost his biological mother she was understanding. But that was the problem, his memories were fragmented, and whilst he’d lost his mother he couldn’t quite remember how it had happened. It could’ve been fiction for all he knew. Biting the inside of his cheek as he thought intently, he cursed and kicked the van.

“Woah, what’s up with you?” Tucker looked up from his meal to see Specs looking angrier than usual.

“I……I’m just worried about Elise. It’s fine.” Specs finished his nuggets and threw the box into Tucker’s makeshift garbage can before wiping the handbrake clean and starting the van. As he started driving, his phone rang and Tucker picked it up for him. Trying to eavesdrop on the conversation, Specs overheard some vague words such as “doctor” and “disturbance” before Tucker hung up and gestured for him park up. Following Tucker’s gesture, Specs located the nearest spot to stop the van, and turned to look at him.

“That was Elise. She wants to meet us.”

“Yeah? Another case?”

“Yeah. It sounds like a nutjob though.”

“Oh?”

“Some doctor, sounds like a rich prick. He offered Elise $10,000 to get rid of the spirit.”

“Do you think he’s trying to get publicity or something?”

“Probably. Anyway, let’s humour him?” Tucker grinned, jumping a little as Specs drove towards the address Elise had texted him. Normally, they’d conduct their tests without too much trouble, and determine the issue of the disturbances within a few hours. Tucker would use his handmade equipment to detect any electrical faults, and Specs would get some information from whoever was experiencing the problem. They would only call Elise if they were certain about some kind of spiritual presence, and she would provide a solution. But as they arrived and started to collect their tools from the boot, Elise was already waiting there. That in itself was an irregular occurrence, and Specs raised his eyebrows as she rushed over to him.

“Steven sweetheart, I…..I would just like Tucker to conduct the investigation today. Would you join me for lunch?” Elise’s voice wavered slightly, and Specs stared at her in confusion.

“Why can’t I go?”

“The…..gentleman is very distressed. He’s requested only one person to be in his house at one time.” Elise lied.

“That’s never been a problem with any of our other cases…”

“Please Steven? I just want to spend some time with you, and Tucker can handle this one. Can’t you?” Elise turned to Tucker, who was barely paying attention and just shrugged. Even though Specs was reluctant, he just nodded and watched Tucker walk up the path, struggling to carry all of his equipment but somehow making it there without breaking anything.

“Steven, come _on.”_ Elise tugged his arm and tried to pull him away from the scene. Letting himself be dragged by her, Specs still couldn’t look away from the house. Tucker was still tapping his foot on the porch waiting for the mysterious doctor. As the door opened, Specs could see Tucker introducing himself, as he always did. But his eyes lingered from his best friend, to the client.

“Hello. I’m Lawrence Gordon. Thank you for coming so quickly.” The blonde man’s voice was barely loud enough to hear from such a distance, but Specs still heard it.

“Tucker.” His best friend shook the man’s hand, and was welcomed into the house. But as Tucker’s figure vanished into the house, the other man stayed lingering at the door for a moment. Specs froze for a moment, ignoring the tugging on his sleeve as he stared straight at the man. He was blonde, broad and tall. There was something menacing about his appearance, or perhaps it was the dark circles under his eyes. Either way, Specs couldn’t take his eyes off him. In particular, the cane that he held was intriguing. It wouldn’t be the first time someone had sustained an injury because of demonic attack, but there was a gut feeling that this man hadn’t been hurt because of a spirit.

“STEVEN!” Elise interrupted, almost screaming at him. Even though he heard her, Specs wasn’t moving. His body went rigid. The mysterious man was staring back at him, his eyes piercing and unyielding. Beautiful, pale blue orbs burned through the lens of his glasses, and he felt his throat close up as he stared back. This man was so familiar, yet a complete stranger. Why were they unable to look away, even for a moment? Specs wanted to speak to him, he wanted to know how one man was able to strike right into his core with just a glance. But his wishes were crushed as Elise finally gathered the strength to pull him away, leaving Specs disorientated and a little……upset?

_Something is not right._


	2. See what I see

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hi all! I’m having a ball writing this, and I’ll cover some of Elise’s perspective in this chapter! Please enjoy!

Hoping that her morning would be uneventful was useless, Elise knew better than to assume one day would be boring and peaceful. In the spirit world, nothing was ever that simple. Demons never relented, and as she slipped out of bed to pet her dog, the phone rang loudly in the kitchen. Rushing downstairs, she almost missed the last ring, but luckily she picked up with a second to spare.

“Hello?”

“Hello there. I’m sorry for calling so early but….is this Mrs Rainer?”

“Oh sweetheart, call me Elise. How can I help you?”

“Okay, Elise. I found your name online. It states that you…..you help people? With…….disturbances?”

“Yes, that’s correct. Is it yourself, that has been experiencing this?”

“Yes. My home…..I believe it’s haunted. I only moved here a few months ago, and since then, I’ve been hearing things….and seeing…..glimpses.” The man on the end of the phone gulped loudly, his voice trembling with fear. Elise gently shushed him and nodded to herself.

“Okay. If you send me your address, I’ll send my team to evaluate your home. We’ll take it step by step. There’s nothing to fear, I can assure you.”

“T-Thank you. Oh and it’s Dr Gordon…” Lawrence hung up, leaving Elise twirling the phone cord around her fingers. Until he’d stated his name, she’d been oblivious to who she was talking to.

_Dr Gordon. Doctor._

Elise shook her head, slamming the phone back against the wall, almost knocking it off in the process. She peeled at a loose piece of wallpaper, sighing as she tried to figure out her next actions. She’d have to tell Specs and Tucker, but she couldn’t let Specs enter that house. Under any circumstance.

As she got dressed, she formulated a strategic plan, to get there before the boys did and stop Specs before he could see Lawrence. It would be very time sensitive, but as she rang Specs’ phone, she got Tucker instead and went through the usual procedures, giving the address and letting them drive towards the house. Even though she’d normally let them conduct their evaluation alone, she managed to get to the address a few moment before the boys arrived. But even as she tried to drag Specs away, he’d already seen far too much.

***

Sitting in a café, Specs stirred his straw around his milkshake so many times, his wrist ached with the effort. Elise was staring at him, unsure of what he’d seen at the house. He looked back at her, frowning a little.

“Why…….why didn’t you want me to meet that man, Elise?”

“It’s…..not that I didn’t want you to meet him. I’m just……I’m worried about you darling. You look thin, I thought a new case might overwhelm you.”

“That’s bullshit, Elise. I’m perfectly fine, and I’d tell you if I was overwhelmed. I’ve seen things that still haunt me at night, but this is different……that man…” Specs tapped his foot against the chair as he sighed softly, pushing his glasses up his nose a little.

“I know him. I don’t know how, but I do. His eyes….there’s something about his eyes.” Specs said softly, but he could tell that Elise wasn’t listening. She’d been staring off into space, possibly to try and avoid his questions. It was a deflective tactic of hers, and he would normally just let it go. But now, he found himself bubbling with rage. His fist hit the table, and she jumped madly.

“Elise! Please, tell me the truth.”

“I am! Steven please, don’t get angry….”

“I’m not angry!” Specs stood up, but before he knew it he was panting with clenched fists. He opened his mouth, but no words came out. He straightened his tie and ran out of the café, panting outside against the wall. Everything was getting blurry, and as he took his glasses off to wipe his eyes, the world suddenly flicked into sharp focus. It didn’t make any sense, and as he stared through the glass, he noticed that he could see perfectly with or without them. In fact, there was only minimal changes when he put his glasses back on. Shaking his head, he rushed down the street, straight back to the mystery address.

Even though his feet had carried him down the road, Specs still wasn’t able to ring the doorbell when he reached the house. Aspects of his life were starting to blur, and as well as being curious, he was angry. Unbearably angry. It wasn’t like him at all to be flooding with rage, especially at his adoptive mother. But Elise wasn’t being honest with him, and it seemed he could only get answers from the one man that had him so worked up. His questions would remain in his mind as he heard rustling from within the house, and he hid behind the porch. Tucker opened the door and wheeled his assortment of equipment out, his evaluation finished in under an hour. Keeping out of sight, Specs pressed against the pillar to listen.

“Okay sir, we’ll be in touch. Please call us if anything happens in the meantime, but we’ll get back to you as soon as we can.” Tucker said as he pulled a bag of crisps out of his pocket.

“Thank you. Will……Elise have to check the house too?”

“I’m not sure yet. I’ll confer with my team, and we’ll decide together. See you later.” Tucker nodded and dragged his equipment to the van, trying to eat crisps at the same time. Lawrence lingered at the door again, almost like he was waiting. But Specs felt a lump forming in his throat, and he was worried he might give this man a heart attack if he just jumped out from his hiding place. Lawrence sighed deeply and went back inside, the sadness across his face making Specs wish he had the confidence to speak to him. But alas, he waited until Lawrence had gone and bolted back to the van, startling Tucker out of his thoughts.

“Fuck! Where the hell did you get to? Elise was pretty weird with you..” Tucker raised his eyebrows and offered him a bar of chocolate. Specs shook his head at the food, but nodded at his statement.

“She really didn’t want me to see that guy…..”

“I don’t blame her. He’s…..unstable to say the least.”

“Tucker…..have we worked with him before? He seems…..familiar..”

“I don’t think so. I don’t forget people easily. And…..this is a special case.”

“What did you find?”

“Specs, I don’t think he’s experiencing any kind of demonic presence. I know we don’t have the same abilities as Elise, but that house……it’s full of creepy shit…”

“Like, severed heads?”

“No, but it might as well be. Like weird black cloaks and syringes. I know he’s a doctor, but something isn’t right bud. I think…..” Tucker hesitated for a moment and looked through the windscreen. Specs stared at him, his best friend was clearly disturbed by something, so he put his hand on his knee for reassurance.

“Specs, the tests were all clear. If he’s being haunted, it’s not an inhuman spirit. It could be a ghost but……..”

“But what?! Tucker, tell me!”

“Specs…….he looks like a fucking serial killer….” Edging back in his seat a little, Specs furrowed his brows. The man he’d seen was not giving off sinister energy at all, it was a deep sadness. Perhaps Tucker couldn’t see what he saw, but there was more to it.

“Tucker, what was his name?”

“Lawrence Gordon.”

_Lawrence Gordon. Alison Gordon. Diana Gordon. Zepp……..Names plucked from seemingly thin air, but they held significance._


	3. Take me back to the night we met

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hiya! My inspiration for the title of this chapter is taken from another show, disclaimer that it's not my orginial idea! I hope you enjoy this chapter, again comments and kudos are really so great to see, love to you all :D <3

Screaming loudly, Specs almost hit his head as he fell out of bed, landing on the cold floor. He cursed, and really wished he’d brought the rug that Tucker had suggested. Specs wasn’t a stranger to the occasional nightmare, but night terrors were a different story. To an outsider, seeing all the demons Specs had encountered, it would be natural to assume that he couldn’t sleep. But oddly, he never dreamt about any of the demons he’d seen. The only thing that haunted his dreams were reality, and this time, the cold floor was a strange relief, from the hot sweat he’d developed whilst unconscious. As he laid on the floor, he clenched his shirt and heard the door open.

“Specs! Shit, what the hell happened?” Tucker knelt down, staring at his friend. To make it easier on the rent, Tucker had moved in a few weeks ago after suffering some personal bills, and whilst Specs was happy to have him there, he would’ve preferred to lay on the icy floorboards. Why? A sense of comfort in the freezing confines of the oak floor.

“Tucker, go back to bed. I’m fine.”

“You’re laying on the floor in your boxers, seriously Specs? Get up.”

“Get out, please. I’m getting up, okay?” Specs glared at him, making Tucker shrug and slink off back to his room. When he heard the door shut, he sprawled around on the floor, moving onto his stomach as he stared into his open wardrobe. There was a pink tie in there, one that he’d never worn but had treasured, given to him by his previous lover, Imogen. She was just a memory now, one of the sweetest. Even the thought of her made him scowl, his eyes flickering to the mirror instead.

_“You’re not a victim, Steven.” Imogen pointed at him, stabbing the air._

_No, that wasn’t quite right._

_“YOU’RE NOT A VICTIM IN THIS, ADAM!”_

Specs jumped, his face suddenly smacking the ground. Luckily his glasses were safe on his nightstand, but his forehead had suffered severe damage. A knock to the head, a knock to the heart, as it were.

“Tucker!” Specs yelled, wandering into the kitchen to find a plaster. He ran a cloth under the tap and dabbed his head, but he was bleeding heavily. Tucker rubbed his eyes and walked into the kitchen like a zombie.

“Fuck! Specs, what is wrong with you tonight?! Do I need to call a doctor?”

“Yeah……call that weird one…”

“Specs, you’re acting so weird. I come in, find you rolling around on the floor, and now you’re bleeding. Tell me what’s wrong!”

“I’m….I….Tucker….I keep….remembering things…..like they’re not mine…”

“That doesn’t make sense.”

“I know! But It’s like I’m sleepwalking through the day sometimes. I get little glimpses….but nothing ever forms a full picture. Tucker…..everything is wrong….” Specs panted a little, barely noticing as Tucker patched up his forehead and patted his shoulder.

“Listen bud. We have to speak to Elise. Whatever it is….this thing affecting you……she’ll know. She loves you, she’ll be able to help.”

“She’s not telling me everything. You know as well as I do that I was allowed in that house. But she refused. Why?”

“Let’s ask her!” Tucker smiled softly and sat beside him on one of the kitchen stools. They sat there in the dark, neither of them really noting that it was the middle of the night. After a few moments Specs calmed down, and the two of them engaged in a heated debate over Star Wars. Specs felt comfort in arguing with his best friend, Tucker was the only constant he had in his life, and none of his memories were fragmented when it came to him. Even Elise was starting to falter slightly, but he was very grateful to have his best friend trying to help. When the clock suddenly beeped, Tucker rubbed his eyes as he realized they’d been debating for over an hour, and it was now 4am. As the two of them both returned to their own beds, Specs pulled the sheets over his head and closed his eyes one last time.

_“It’s not me who did this to you, Specs.”_

***

A few days after Tucker’s initial evaluation of Lawrence’s home, a meeting was called to discuss the findings, and figure out the next steps. Tucker felt awkward as he sat between his best friend and his adoptive mother, feeling the growing tension between them. Elise looked wounded, her face detailing a picture of a grieving mother, but Specs was angry and unusual. Tucker didn’t like either of their expressions, and leaned forward with a frown.

“Okay, I know we’re here to discuss the results of my investigation, but first, you two have to make up. This atmosphere sucks.” Tucker said, folding his arms and turned to look at Specs.

“Actually…..I’ve decided that you can work on the case, Steven. I wanted to tell you before but….”

“What the fuck?! Why the sudden change? I don’t get it! I don’t like this at all.” Specs scowled at her, but Elise just smiled.

“You told me you were fine, that you’re not overwhelmed. So you can assistant Tucker in the rest of the procedure. I’m sorry that I asked you to step back. Can we call a truce, please?” Elise outstretched her hand, looking at him with pleading eyes. Specs sighed deeply, but he took her hand anyway. He had to try and take advantage of the situation before Elise changed her mind again, save the questions for later. Tucker wasn’t convinced that they’d made up, but he shrugged and pushed his laptop towards Elise, with the relevant documents open. He’d taken readings of all the electrical devices in the house, checked the attic for loose panels, verified the doctor’s medical records and checked if his previous house had any electrical faults. Every single piece of data indicated that Lawrence was a healthy, sane man. But his account couldn’t be ignored, there was no physical evidence of a haunting, but Elise felt she should observe the house anyway just to check his claims. Tucker had never seen such a strange case, but Specs was eager to intervene as they discussed the findings.

“I don’t have anything to do this afternoon, would you like me to speak to him and get some information?” Specs offered, since Tucker hadn’t had an opportunity to interview the doctor properly. Even though Elise looked hesitant, she nodded at him.

“Yes, that would be helpful.” Elise’s voice lacked emotion, almost as though she was trying to hold back. Her emotions were extremely unclear, and Specs had to fight against the curiosity to get up and leave, immediately heading for the house he’d been longing to enter ever since he’d laid eyes on the mysterious doctor. Trembling as he reached the familiar street, his legs were numb as he approached the door, this time deciding to knock instead of failing to ring the bell. Inside, he could hear shuffling and sniffing, and the sight was like a bullet to the chest.

Lawrence opened the door and stood against the frame, dressed in red silk pyjamas. They were slightly torn, and he had a large red scar on his cheek. His eyes were red and puffy, and fresh tears stained the corners of his eyes. His blonde hair was damp with sweat, and small pants escaped his lips. When he stared at Specs, his icy blue eyes were filled with terror, and he looked as though he might fall unconscious in seconds.

“A-Adam?” Lawrence’s voice was rough and scratchy, he’d either just been screaming or he had a natural deepness to his tone. Specs raised his eyebrows and shook his head, glancing behind him to see whether Lawrence was talking to someone else.

“No sir, my name is Specs. I work with Elise and Tucker…..I’m here to help with your-“ Specs was interrupted by Lawrence falling into his arms, limp and unmoving.


	4. Demons among us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heya everyone! I have to say this chapter is a bit cryptic but I hope you'll still enjoy it! All will become clear very soon :)

Blinking slowly, the last thing Lawrence could remember was falling into someone’s arms, before the universe turned black. When his vision slowly improved, he was laying on his sofa and staring straight up at his light fixture. The lonesome lightbulb, the chandelier had been smashed weeks ago. Chandeliers were a hot spot for demon activity, or so he found out. Rubbing his eyes slightly, he sat up and looked around, wondering how he managed to get to the sofa. His question was answered as Specs emerged from the kitchen, holding two cups. He perched on the sofa tentatively, offering him a cup.

“H-Hey um…..you kinda passed out…..so I brought you in here…” He said nervously.

“You didn’t have to do that, thank you.” Lawrence smiled softly and took the cup, staring down at a steaming hot chocolate with whipped cream and chocolate sprinkles. He didn’t recall owning any sprinkles, but he decided not to ask. Instead he stared at Specs, barely remembering when the other man arrived. It was a sweet gesture, and he sipped the drink with a smile.

“I don’t want to appear rude but……who are you?” Lawrence asked suddenly, startling Specs so much that he almost dropped his cup.

“O-Oh. I’m Specs, I work with Elise and Tucker. I told you that earlier, but you seemed too…..preoccupied to understand.”

“My apologies. I don’t…..remember what I was doing before you arrived. I’m not normally dressed this slovenly, please forgive me.”

“You also……called me Adam.” Specs stared at him, curious why Lawrence wouldn’t remember what he was doing. Maybe the man had some kind of amnesia, but he’d heard Lawrence loud and clear when he’d said the name.

“Adam?” Lawrence titled his head and shrugged, still unsure of what Specs was referring to. “Did I really call you that? Again, I’m afraid I can’t recall….”

Specs didn’t like the way Lawrence was suddenly so composed and calm, judging by the demeanour he displayed at the door, he knew he had to investigate further. When Lawrence’s head was turned, Specs carefully moved his hand over his pocket, his phone dialling Tucker’s as he acted normally. He’d established a code with Tucker, and if either of them said the code word, the other would know to be quiet and just stay on the phone.

“Unicorn!” Specs suddenly exclaimed, making Lawrence frown and glance at him.

“I beg your pardon?”

“Oh sorry, I saw an advert for unicorn hot chocolate earlier, and I looked for some in your cupboard but I could only find the regular stuff. Is it good?” He gestured to Lawrence’s now empty cup.

“Yes, that was nice thank you. But there was really no need, you’re very polite for a stranger…”

“You were pretty freaked out by something, I thought it might help.”

“Freaked out? I’m still not quite sure what you’re….”

“Dude…..your clothes are ripped, and your have a huge cut right here.” Specs leaned forward and dragged his finger down Lawrence’s facial laceration. Both men flinched at the action, Lawrence because of the pain, but Specs because of a strange jolt of electricity. Recognition and fragments started to bubble over again, and he closed his eyes to make sense of it.

_“I-I have to g-go, or I’m going to bleed t-to death…”_

_“No…..please don’t leave me….”_

Lawrence’s eyebrows were permanently knitted together as he watched Specs have a panic attack, or some kind of psychotic episode. Not that he’d know the difference, but it was still disturbing to watch. He shook Specs’ shoulder, trying to shake the man out of this experience. His shakes became more frantic, until Specs’ eyes shot open, looking back at him.

“Hey…..lost you there for a minute.” Lawrence smiled softly.

“What…..What just happened?” Specs took off his glasses to rub his eyes again, but this time he was met with a hostile face as he looked back up.

“Have……Have you always worn glasses?”

“Yeah…..why do you ask?” Specs moved to put his glasses back on, but Lawrence knocked them out of his hand, scattering one of the lenses. He scowled at him and bent over to try and retrieve them, but as he did so Lawrence shoved him on the floor, the thud of his active mobile also hitting the hardwood floor. He sat on top of him, leaving Specs shaking madly in terror. He’d been subdued before, and this was eerily like some of his past cases. Reaching for his mobile, he felt Lawrence’s arm press on his throat as he watched the other man picking up his phone. Tucker’s name was still across the screen, he’d heard the whole thing.

“You’ve been recording this?” Lawrence growled, his arm tightening against his neck. Specs spluttered a little, his eyes widening as Lawrence threw his phone against the wall.

“What the fuck do you want, huh? You want to just stroll into my home and find out shit about me?!” Lawrence was snarling, his lips twisting into a weird smirk. Specs was terror-stricken, but all the physical contact was only creating more fragments.

“I…I’m here……because Elise asked me to come….to interview you about the demon in your home….” Specs managed to squeak out from underneath Lawrence’s arm.

“W-What? What…….demon?”

“You tell me.” Lawrence immediately jumped off Specs, his own fragmented memories causing him to forget why he was on top of him in the first place. Specs stood up, rubbing his throat. A bruise would definitely form, and he’d lost his mobile and glasses in Lawrence’s strange outburst. Despite the previous terror, Specs stared at the taller man with interest. The man in question was leaning against his sofa, panting lightly.

“I’m sorry……shit…..what’s happening to me…” Lawrence covered his face and his pants grew heavy, the word “demon” sparking some kind of mental breakdown. Specs was grateful to be able to stand and not be strangled to death by Lawrence’s arm, but he still had work to do.

“Lawrence?” Specs went over to him and instinctively put his forehead on the doctor’s, he wasn’t sure where the instinct came from, but it was as though he wasn’t in control of his own actions anymore. Lawrence breathed heavily, shutting his eyes and gripping Specs’ head as his own forehead connected with his.

_“Adam…….what are you doing here?”_

_“I don’t know……I was just…….sent here….”_

_“Save me Adam, I can’t do this on my own…”_

_“I can’t do that, Lawrence. You gotta find the key, and save yourself.”_

Then it was all over, Lawrence was just leaning against a complete stranger, again.


	5. Unclear Intentions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! I'm so so so happy with the kudos and comments, it gives me such a high and anyone who is reading this you make my day better!   
> Okay so this chapter focuses on Specs and Tucker being cute and besties, and then Elise showing a little darker side when it comes to Lawrence! Please enjoy, and I love reading the theories and thought so thank you so much! :) <3

When Specs’ phone was destroyed, Tucker had heard a huge commotion, with various loud thuds and angry growls. As he was still sitting with Elise, the two of them stared at each other in horror and jumped in the van, Tucker driving fast than was permitted. Tucker was terrified for his friends’ safety, whereas Elise was almost certain something of that calibre would happen. It only confirmed her suspicious that she never should’ve let Specs go to the house alone, but perhaps it was tempting fate that would help the investigation. When Tucker parked sloppily outside the house, the two of them bolted inside and expected to see Specs unconscious or being thrown around by some spirit, but instead they found Specs and Lawrence resting on each other’s forehead, with Lawrence gripping desperately at Specs’ hair.

“What the fuck happened?!” Tucker shouted, startling the other two men away from each other.

“O-Oh it’s okay. I just tripped…..clumsy.” Specs shrugged and shoved his broken phone in his pocket, with his equally broken glasses. Elise looked around the house, her eyes narrowing a little when she looked at Lawrence. Lawrence was breathing a little easier, still using the sofa as a support as he looked back at her.

“Are….Are you Elise?” He asked.

“Yes. Why don’t we have a little chat, Doctor Gordon? You boys go home, I’ll handle it from here.” Elise smiled softly at Specs and Tucker, but only received a smile back from one of them.

“Okay. Come on Specs.” Tucker was still frowning, practically pulling Specs out of the house by his collar. Specs scowled as he was thrown into the van by his best friend, without even a chance to ask Lawrence if he was okay. He’d never seen Tucker look so furious before.

The journey home was uncomfortably silent, Specs stared out of the window and couldn’t stop thinking about Lawrence, he was extremely curious about what he was thinking when they rested against each other. The other man had gone blank, his expression was pained but it was almost as though he was channelling through his mind. He felt guilty for feeling so preoccupied with someone else, when Tucker was obviously angry about something. When they reached the house, they headed inside without even a glance in the other’s direction, until Tucker broke the tension with another shout.

“What the fuck Specs?! Elise might have swallowed your bullshit, but I won’t.”

“What the hell? I’m not lying!”

“Yes you fucking are! I heard you on the phone! Why else would you call me unless you’re in danger?!”

“I called you to record the interview!”

“Did he attack you?”

“No!”

“WHAT DID HE FUCKING DO TO YOU?!” Tucker stepped forward, his height already giving him in an advantage in their argument, but Specs could be vicious if he wanted to be.

“HE DIDN’T DO ANYTHING! I’M FINE!”

“DO YOU KNOW HOW FUCKING WORRIED I WAS?!” Both men stood close, shoulders squared and eyes narrowed, until Tucker’s last words made Specs loosen slightly. Surprised at his own outburst, Tucker cast his eyes to the ground and slunk down onto the sofa, his heavy breathing making Specs’ heart drop as he settled down next to him. Tucker still couldn’t meet his eyes and leaned against a cushion, crossing his arms and legs.

“Tucker….”

“Don’t. There was a time you’d think twice about lying to me, but I guess you don’t trust me enough.”

“It’s not like that. Tucker, I trust you more than anyone in the world.”

“Then why won’t you tell me what happened?”

“Because…….because I don’t know what happened. It was all so fast…..it’s just a blur….” Specs spent the next few minutes explaining everything to Tucker, that Lawrence had freaked out and perhaps had amnesia, or some kind of cognitive impairment. Tucker listened carefully to the story, knowing that Elise would be able to determine if was amnesia, or even a possible paranormal infestation. When Specs finally reached the part of the story when he was underneath Lawrence and his anger was flaring, Tucker reached out and grabbed his knee, terror filling his facial features.

“Are you sure he didn’t hurt you?! It sounds like he was trying to stop you breathing….”

“It hurt, but I’m fine. I’ll have a badass bruise huh?” Specs chuckled, but winced a little when his joke wasn’t well received.

“That’s not funny. He broke your glasses too?” Tucker caressed Specs’ cheek gently, realizing that he’d never seen his best friend look so vulnerable before.

“That was my fault……” Specs lied, knowing full well that Lawrence broke his glasses on purpose, but he wasn’t sure why.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Tucker repeated, his hand rested comfortably on Specs’ face and he received a nod from him. Specs stared at him, slightly puzzled by his expression. He relaxed against his hand and raised one of his eyebrows.

“Why are you staring at me?” He said suddenly.

“You look weird without glasses. Like…..someone else.”

“Well luckily, I can get my spare pair now.” Specs smirked and detached from his hand for a moment, reaching over to grab his spare pair from the table. When he put them on, he turned to look at his friend.

“Better.” Tucker grinned.

“You’re a freak. But…..I’m sorry I worried you.”

“It’s okay. Come on, let’s make popcorn and play that new game I got.” Tucker smiled softly, jumping a little as Specs launched at him, giving him a very sincere and heartfelt hug. Although Tucker was a little surprised, he nestled back against the smaller man and felt his smile grow, he could never stay angry at his best friend. The hug was warm and reassuring to Specs too, he knew that he’d be worried if had been Tucker in the same situation, and with his memories constantly changing, it was good to have one constant good thing in his life.

***

Back at Lawrence’s house, Specs and Tucker’s departure had put Elise in a state of worry. Firstly, she was concerned for Specs, but she needed to understand everything that happened. Lawrence was still looking intently at her as he managed to sit down in an armchair.

“Doctor Gordon, may I call you Lawrence?” Elise asked politely as she sat opposite him, a sweet smile plastered across her face.

“Y-Yes. I’m sorry but…..I’m not quite sure what’s happening…”

“That’s perfectly fine, Lawrence. Now, I would just like you to take some deep breaths. Nobody is going to hurt you.” She continued speaking calmly, trying her best to help Lawrence return to normality. She could see him struggling to breathe, but eventually his chest rose at the right pace and he stared curiously.

“I called you……to help me…..didn’t I?”

“Yes, you did. Tucker evaluated your home, do you remember? The gentleman that checked your electrical devices?”

“Yes….and there was another man…”

“Yes, that’s right. But Lawrence, let’s talk about you. What do you do for a living?”

“I’m…….I’m a doctor…..I think…”

“You’re not sure?”

Lawrence shook his head, weaving a hand through his blonde waves. He wasn’t sure if Adam had been a hallucination, or just bore some extreme similarities with Specs, but it had shaken his nerves.

“Tell me, Lawrence, did you lose someone?”

“Lose…….I….my wife divorced me and my daughter hates me.”

“No dear, I mean did you lose someone close to you? A loved one perhaps?”

“I’m not sure what you’re getting at…” Lawrence rested against his palm as Elise sat with her eyes closed, engaged in unseen activity.

“I’m told…..it was your sister?”

“I don’t have a sister….”

Elise nodded lightly, opening her eyes as she smiled at him. She knew what was happening to him, but if he wasn’t aware of the situation she wasn’t going to cause a panic. At least, she had to make sure her son was safe first.

“Lawrence, I can assure you that I can help you with this issue you’re having. However, I need you to promise something.”

“What’s that?”

“The methods that will be used in order to cleanse your house could become unorthodox and contradict medical or religious teachings. As a doctor, I know you’ll strive to try and find a logical solution but I can assure you this won’t work. I need you to give your absolute trust to me and my team to help you.”

“I promise, you’ll have it. I just want to stop losing my mind…”

“There’s something else.” Elise looked around the room, lowering her voice even though she knew it would make little difference.

“I know you don’t remember me, Lawrence. But if you try and corrupt Specs, I won’t help you. He’s not who you think he is. If you ever call him by his birth name, or tell him about the bathroom, I will invite demons into your home. This spirit that is taunting you now, will seem light in comparison for what I could do to you. Do not inflict John’s corruption on my son. Do you understand?” Elise’s voice turned darker, and her eyes were harsh. Lawrence barely understood what she was referring to, but he nodded shakily as she neared him, like a lion waiting to attack a deer. When his head had moved, Elise immediately returned to normal and smiled widely.

“Perfect, I will call you when we’re ready to perform the solution. Thank you for your hospitality!” Elise smiled, an eerily sweet smile as she left the house. Lawrence blinked slowly as he heard rattling upstairs, the realization suddenly hitting him like a lightning bolt.

_“Specs……you’re in danger!”_


	6. Possessive Problems

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hellooooo lovelies! Again, all the comments are just making me smile so much and I am very grateful! This chapter is a little backtracking to try and explain why Lawrence was feeling strange! Enjoy! <3
> 
> ALSO BIG HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO CARY ELWES TODAY :)

_6 months before Lawrence called Elise._

“This is perfect, thank you.” Lawrence smiled widely, shaking hands with the realtor that had found him a nice two bedroom house that was suitable for his needs. He’d wanted a house with a spare room for Diana, not that she wanted to see him after everything. It was in a quiet neighbourhood and close to the hospital, so his work wouldn’t suffer either. Even as he signed the contracts for the house, it was surprisingly cheap. Everything about the house was too good to be true, but Lawrence was tired of searching and just wanted to settle down. He didn’t know it would prove to be such a problem in the future.

For a month, everything remained peaceful and serene. He’d made friends in the area, and he’d done some decorating to make his house feel like a home. But after he’d started to rearrange different objects, they mysteriously moved back into their old position. If he threw away any of the items that came with the house, they’d reappear the next day. He was running around in circles, trying to improve the house but making no progress. Then the noises started. The doors would bang together, sometimes until midnight. Every alarm in the house would go off at 2am, and a strange whining noise could be heard in the bathroom. Lawrence had trouble going to the bathroom anyway, but he couldn’t even go near the door around that time or he’d hear the same noises over and over. The noise became so bad, that he started to lose shifts due to fatigue, or the inability to concentrate. He couldn’t afford to keep living in constant irritation, so he started to search online for solutions. He tried everything, but none of the remedies made any difference. In fact, the noises got worse, and then the visions started.

Lawrence had never entertained the possibility that he could be disturbing a spirit. He wracked his brains trying to think of reasonable explanations, but the visions couldn’t be explained away. Little gusts of wind would wake him up, and when he opened his eyes he prayed that he was dreaming. But he never was, and then he finally understood why he was being tortured. One night cleared up the entire situation.

“Wake up, _Larry_.” A voice stirred Lawrence out of his sleep, and as he blinked rapidly, noticing a dark figure in the corner of the room. Sitting up in bed, he clutched the covers.

“W-Who’s there?” He reached for his cane, but it wasn’t there.

“Who do you think? Were you hoping for your previous little Adam?” The voice spat back at him, cackling as it did so.

“Get out of my house..” Lawrence said shakily.

“I don’t think so. Does it still hurt, Lawrence? That you left him to die?”

“S-Stop it!”

“I see you, crying into your pillow at night. You’re pathetic.”

“SHUT UP! GET OUT OF MY HEAD!”

“Oh believe me, I’m real. And I’m not done playing with you. Let’s see how long you can play this game, Lawrence. I’ll destroy everything you love.” With that, the spirit vanished from the room. Lawrence breathed out, naively thinking that it was just a dream, but when he woke up, his body was not his own. He was in a dark universe, suspended in thin air.

“Ugh. It’s a shame about this body. But, I suppose it’ll do.” The spirit had taken half of Lawrence’s soul, and was now using the physical vessel to conduct its vengeance. It started with Alison and Diana, ignoring all of the phone calls and blocking them out in any way it could. It avoided all human contact, and sloppily left its black capes and pig heads on full display. If it was going to continue its work, it would need them handy. But it wasn’t bargaining on Lawrence taking back control, it thought it had achieved its goal of using his physical vessel, but Lawrence was stronger than he’d anticipated. Sudden bursts of energy meant that Lawrence could sometimes return to his body, but he had to do it when the latter was sleeping. But it came at a price, each time he returned he was injured, a scratch or a cut from the physical manifestation. The spirit still remained completely unharmed, but Lawrence was beginning to weaken. After three weeks, Lawrence had battled so hard to get back to himself that he crawled to the phone and dialled a number that was in his address book.

“H-Hello…..I’m sorry for calling so early but…” Lawrence managed to lie to get Elise to come to his aid, he couldn’t tell her the truth. It was starting to become so frequent, that his memories were starting to distort anyway. When he’d scraped himself off the floor, the spirit was even angrier, and delighted in making Lawrence scold himself with hot water. It had heard the phone call, and it was in danger of being discovered.

“You’re in big trouble, Larry. Good luck trying to get back to your body!” The spirit sneered and commanded his body for the longest period of time, all through Tucker’s evaluation and through any further calls. But on the day of Specs’ visit, Lawrence regained momentary control through their conversation.

“Have…you always worn glasses?” Lawrence’s spirit managed to ask, but then the other spirit managed to pick up on what was happening. The aggression returned and almost killed Specs, but only because Lawrence had mistaken him for Adam. But the game was starting to get difficult for the spirit, because he could only keep up the pretence for so long. Tucker might have fallen for it, but Specs and Elise knew something was wrong. Specs in particular, was extremely intriguing. He knew Elise was dangerous, based on her readings and knowledge that John had given her, but it wasn’t the same as Specs. Specs was also fragmented, parts of his soul were floating in the same dimension as Lawrence’s. It angered him, and he decided to leave Lawrence’s body one last time to inflict the same pain he’d been prescribing Lawrence.

It was at this point, Lawrence realized Specs was in serious danger. He might have his physical vessel back, but the spirit was worse when in it’s dormant form. Adam had come to him in The Further, and told him that he had to save himself. Despite the enormous guilt he still felt over leaving Adam to die, somehow seeing his spirit gave him a clear head, clear enough to try and stop the other spirit trying to possess Specs too. Grabbing his phone and cane, he’d phoned a taxi and had given vague instructions as he googled “Spectral Sightings” and came up with an address. The name had been plucked from the deepest recesses of his mind, but he prayed again that it would lead him in the right direction. Eventually the taxi driver pulled up and he paid, walking as fast as he could to the door. He struggled on the steps, but when he reached the door he knocked frantically.

“Tucker, you can’t have been that quick-“ Specs opened the door and jumped madly at Lawrence’s arrival.

“Specs, come with me.” Lawrence grabbed his arm and dragged him outside.

“What the fuck? You’re hurting me!” Specs scowled as Lawrence dragged him into the sunlight.

“You’re in danger. You have to come with me.” Lawrence could only think of one place that Specs would be safe, but Elise wouldn’t be happy. He ignored any distractions and kept an iron grip on Specs’ slightly trembling wrist. He was aggressive in his determination, and needed to act fast.

_“I’ll get you to safety, I promise Adam.”_


	7. Memory Surface

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! I had a few bits of work to do before I could publish this chapter, It's a long-ish one so I hope you enjoy it! Oh and there's some very romantic scenes coming up soon, I love those :) Please enjoy this one, and all the support is amazing so kudos to you all! <3

Specs wasn’t expecting to see Lawrence again so soon, and he definitely didn’t know the latter was going to drag him to an unknown building. From the outside, it was a normal apartment complex, but the inside was different. There was a strong stench of decay, and the mould crawling off each damp wall made him hold his nose. Lawrence was delirious, and he never let go of Specs’ wrist as he continued to drag him upstairs. Desperate to escape his clutches, Specs tried to free himself but he couldn’t, and as they reached the top row of apartments, he was thrown into one of them as his arm was finally freed. As Lawrence turned to the door, he locked three deadbolts and rummaged with a key.

“W-Where……are we?” Specs’ voice wavered slightly.

“This apartment, it belonged to a friend of mine. She was murdered, and I tried to make things right. I asked someone to cleanse this space, so we can speak freely.”

“Cleanse? It takes a powerful psychic to cleanse something. There’s only a few people in the world with that ability.” Specs perched on the end of a sofa, despite the entire building starting to rot, the items inside the apartment were relatively untouched. Sighing deeply, Lawrence finished locking the door and sat beside him.

“Specs. This isn’t the first time I’ve met Elise. I’ve known her for years, but….when I started experiencing activity in my home……I didn’t want to call her but I didn’t know what else to do…”

“Why……Why are we here Lawrence?” Specs played with a thread sticking out of the sofa, starting expectantly at the other man. Suspecting that Lawrence wasn’t just lying about Elise, he wanted to understand his intentions.

“My friend, she was called Jill. Her sister……..her sister was Elise.”

“I thought Elise’s only family was her brother Christian…”

“Elise is lying to you, Specs. You’re right, she has Christian. But, Jill was unexpected. Her mother was one of the victims that got away.”

“Oh……how do you know so much about that?”

“Because…” Lawrence paused, running a hand through his fringe. Elise had warned him not to tell Specs anything, but he couldn’t hold back when he knew the latter was in danger.

“I know everything about Elise. But I didn’t think she’d do something like this…”

“Like what?”

“Like put you in direct danger. She suppressed your memories, didn’t she?”

“What the fuck? Elise would never put me in danger, she loves me. She’s my mom.”

“Specs, wake the fuck up. She might love you, but she’s deceiving you. Don’t you want to know the truth?” Leaning back against the cushions, Lawrence stared at a very confused Specs. His eyebrows were furrowed, and he could feel the anger radiating off him.

“Don’t act like you know me, you don’t know shit. What’s all this crap about the truth? I’m not the one in the dark here.” Specs crossed his arms, glaring at the man next to him.

“Huh?”

“That day, in your house. I knew that you were possessed, I’ve seen enough people under demonic influence to spot it now. Or maybe you really did want to kill me?”

“No! That’s not…”

“So cut all of this shit about Elise, and tell me the truth. Why are we here?”

“He’ll kill you……..He wants to hurt you. That’s why I had no choice. Elise told me not to tell you, but if I don’t you’ll forget.”

“Tell me what?!”

“YOU’RE NOT YOU, SPECS! ELISE DRAGGED YOU OUT OF THAT BATHROOM AND MADE YOU INTO THIS! SHE FUCKED YOU UP!” Lawrence panted softly, covering his mouth as he realized he’d be eternally damned by Elise. Watching the other man carefully, he bit his lip as he watched confusion wash all through Specs’ face.

“You’re lying. I don’t know who you think I am but…”

“Open your shirt.”

“Huh?”

“Open. Your. Shirt. You have an old gunshot wound by your shoulder. It’s over ten years old now, but it’s still there.” Cautiously, Specs turned away from him and loosened his tie a little. Opening a few buttons on his shirt, he slipped his hand inside and stroked along his chest, gasping when he felt slightly raised, taught skin in the exact place Lawrence had described. He was starting to panic, demons and ghosts were easy to deal with, humans were harder.

“H-How…”

“I did that to you. I shot you.” Sidling closer to Specs, Lawrence put his hand on his shoulder. Jumping madly, Specs turned to face him, still panting lightly.

“Why?! I thought you didn’t want to kill me?! You’re a fucking liar….”

“I don’t want to kill you, I never have. Forgive me…” Running his hand over Specs’ collar, his hand dropped down into his shirt and ran over the scar, his eyes were starting to well up. Lawrence’s fingers rested on Specs’ chest, and he felt his breathing elevate. Gasping suddenly, Specs closed his eyes as a new memory surfaced.

_“LET ME FUCKING GO! LET ME GO!” Adam struggled in the hospital bed, lashing out at three doctors gathered around him. One of them injected him with a large dose of sedative, and his wails soon turned to light whimpers. He slept for days, and when he eventually woke, he was restrained to the bed. His eyes flickered, and he kept losing consciousness. Everything was so blurry, and the only clear voice was that of a elderly woman._

_“Sweetheart, it’s okay. You’re safe now.” The woman stroked his head and helped him sip water through a straw._

_“He left me to die…” Adam whispered, his throat dry._

_“I know, I know. But he’ll never hurt you again, my dear. I’ll protect you.” The woman kissed his forehead, and he settled back to sleep. But the anger, the anger would never fade away._

Specs’ eyes burst open, and whilst he couldn’t remember everything, he knew Lawrence was responsible. He grabbed his wrist and panted hard, digging his nails into his skin.

“You…….YOU FUCKING BASTARD!” Specs launched at him, desperately trying to hit him but finding both of his wrists restrained. Most of his emotions had been repressed, but now he was full of so much rage, he was worried what he was capable of. Luckily, Lawrence held on tight and stared up at him.

“Please….Please listen to me!”

“NO! YOU FUCKING LEFT ME TO DIE!”

“ADAM!”

“STOP CALLING ME THAT!” Specs managed to free one of his hands, hitting Lawrence hard across the face. Lawrence frowned and rolled off the sofa, pinning Specs to the floor with his weight. He regained control of his wrists and panted angrily, his cheek turning red from the slap. Specs panted madly, unable to struggle with Lawrence on top of him.

“L-Let me go…” Specs whispered, shaking crazily as Lawrence stared at him.

“No. You have to listen.”

“No I don’t! You don’t care about me! You’ve tried to kill me so many times! I fucking hate you!”

“Adam…” Hearing his name cut like a knife every time Lawrence said it, and he lashed out again until he felt Lawrence loop his hand through his fingers.

“Adam, listen to me. I never wanted to leave you. I wanted to come back for you. I cry myself to sleep almost every night because I left you……I left you in that place, and you have every right to hate me. When I saw you……I thought I was crazy. I thought you were dead…..I’ll never forgive myself for what I did to you….” Feeling Lawrence trembling above him, Specs felt his anger slipping away, and he gently pushed the other man off him so he could rest on his forehead.

“I don’t……I don’t hate you.” Specs sighed softly, wrapping his arms around him. Lawrence clung to him so tightly, like he couldn’t let go. Maybe he couldn’t, it had been so long since he’d had control of his physical vessel, he needed to hold him. As Specs nestled into his shoulder, he felt tears dripping onto his back. He couldn’t remember Lawrence fully, but he was determined to try. Turning to face him, he kept one hand on his back, but used the other to wipe his tears.

“I’m so sorry…..”

“Lawrence, it’s okay. I’m……I don’t have all of my memories but…..I’m here.”

“Do….you mind if I keep calling you Adam?”

“No. But….I need your help to remember. Will you tell me, starting at the beginning?”

“Yeah.” Wiping his eyes, Lawrence adjusted so he had Specs in his lap, resting his chin on his head. He started telling the whole story, about the bathroom, but only the bathroom. He wasn’t willing to go into details about Elise or John yet, Specs was already processing so much that he didn’t want to overwhelm him. Just the bathroom, and the guilt he felt for everything. As he started to talk about his escape, he jumped as he heard Specs’ breathing slow down, and he started snoring lightly in his lap. He played with his hand, kissing each of his fingers.

“There’s one thing that I want to tell you, is that I love you. But I think, we’ll save that story for another day.” Lawrence murmured softly, stroking Specs’ hair as he slept, feeling Specs grip his hand tightly.


	8. Tucker's Temperament

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hello lovely readers! I’m still loving this crossover concept, it’s fun to write and I really hope it’s fun to read! I am starting to get a bit stuck for future ideas though, so if you want to contribute something please let me know! I can chat on discord too if that’s something that interests you 😊 Anyway, enjoy this chapter! This one is mostly Specs and Tucker fluff, that's why it's a bit shorter!

Despite the spirit still seeking Specs to exact it’s vengeance, Specs had remained undetected. As he’d stayed overnight in the cleansed apartment, the effects wouldn’t wear off just yet. But he didn’t have much time, he’d need to speak to Elise, to finally rid the world of the spirit. However, he wasn’t completely sure of his identity anymore. Lawrence had poured his heart out, trying to get him to remember who he really was. Even as Lawrence accompanied him home, he couldn’t shake the strange pain in his stomach when he called him Adam. It wasn’t his name, or at least it wasn’t his name anymore. He’d heard the stories, that he’d been in some elaborate game, but those memories wouldn’t return fully to him. Only snippets, and he found himself feeling uncomfortable when Lawrence spoke about it. Thanking him for the ride, he waved and darted back into his familiar home. Back into concerned, loving arms. Tucker was all over him, clearly terrified that something had happened.

“What the hell happened yesterday?! I go out to buy snacks, and then you just leave! You didn’t even come home last night! Why didn’t you answer your goddamn phone?!”

“I’m sorry Tucker. I had a weird day yesterday…..can we just restart today?” Specs leaned against him, chewing his lip at the memory of the previous night. He’d fallen asleep in Lawrence’s arms, surprisingly comforted by his presence. His face flushed at the thought, and he shook his head as he revelled in Tucker’s hug.

“Sure. But don’t leave like that again, please? I was scared, Elise said some weird things too.” Tucker went to the sofa with his best friend, collecting a bag of Maltesers on the way and sharing it with Specs. Specs put his legs over Tucker’s thighs and stared at him.

“What weird things?”

“About that doctor dude. That he’s dangerous, and I have to look out for you.”

“That’s……..he’s not dangerous.”

“How could you possibly know that?”

“U-Uh…..that’s where I was last night….”

“YOU SLEPT WITH HIM?!”

“No, for fuck’s sake Tucker! W-We just talked…”

“You’re lying to me again. I can read you like a book. Why would you get involved with a psycho like him?!”

“Tucker stop it! You don’t even know what you’re talking about!” Specs threw a cushion at him, crossing his arms and huffing.

“Yeah, well go and play around with your new friend then. I’m done with this.” Tucker threw the cushion back and headed towards the kitchen. Specs frowned and felt sadness wash over him at his friend’s harsh words. He stepped into the kitchen and leaned against the doorframe, crossing his arms again.

“What’s wrong? Why do you care so much about this?”

“I was worried about you! Maybe you’d be fine if I just disappeared in the middle of the night?”

“Of course I wouldn’t be fine! I care about you!”

“Not as much as I care!”

“That’s not fair! You’re my best friend for god’s sake-“ Specs was about to start shouting, but he was interrupted by a mumble that he barely heard, but caught the end of.

“I love you.”

“H-Huh?”

“I’m in love with you, Specs. I know that surprises you. I didn’t want to tell you, I knew it would ruin everything.” Tucker shrugged, speaking so casually that nobody would’ve known he’d made such a heartfelt confession. It was undoubtedly a way of coping with his emotions, suspecting that Specs would reject him immediately. But instead of hearing the door open and Specs run through it, the shorter man came over to him and patted his shoulder.

“I love you too, Tucker.”

“It’s not the same. You just want hugs and snacks. I want to do….like things couples do…”

“What do couples do? Kiss and have sex?”

“Specs! Don’t say it so bluntly.”

“What? I don’t understand what you mean. You’re right that I want hugs and snacks, because that’s all I have in me…..my head is all over the place right now. There’s so much to say….”

“So……start at the beginning?” Tucker reached in the cupboard and pulled out popcorn, tossing it to him as they settled back on the sofa. Specs smiled widely, then started explaining everything. He told Tucker about his identity crisis, and all of the crazy details Lawrence had told him yesterday. It was easy to speak to Tucker about it, because he sat patiently and hung onto every word. It was a very comforting trait. When he’d finished the story about the bathroom, Tucker leant back and considered quietly to himself.

“That’s when I found out……that I’m supposed to be this guy Adam….” Specs took his glasses off and cleaned the lenses.

“But you’re not. You’re Steven Simmons, right?”

“I don’t know anymore. There’s things that Lawrence knew about me. Like this scar, that I didn’t even know I had. And I keep getting these little memories……but I can’t quite….understand them.”

“Maybe they’re not yours. Maybe he got it wrong, and his guilt for this Adam guy is still lingering. The power of suggestion is stronger than a living being, remember Elise taught us that?”

“Yeah but……I don’t know. Something feels odd. We need to speak to Elise again, she helped us last time.” Specs let out a heavy sigh and rested against Tucker, feeling the other man stroke his back to relax the tension. He bit his lip and sat up slightly, staring at him.

“You think I’m crazy, don’t you?”

“Yes. But you’ve always been crazy. This is different. I don’t want you to carry this burden alone, and I promise I’ll help you find out who you are.” Tucker smiled, the curve of his lips making Specs blush for a moment.

“You’re an amazing guy, you know. Thank you.” Biting his lip, Specs felt even more heat rush to his cheeks as Tucker placed his hands on his face.

“I know you don’t know your feelings yet but uhh……can I kiss you?” Tucker asked nervously, earning a small chuckle from Specs.

“Yes. You don’t need to ask me so politely..” Specs grinned, closing his eyes. Neither of them really knew what they were doing, after being friends for so long it still felt strange to even consider the other in a romantic sense. Tucker leaned forward a left a very gentle peck on Specs’ lips, pulling away shyly.

“No, it feels wrong to kiss you when you’re confused. Let’s get this issue sorted first, hm?” Tucker left the room, clearly embarrassed by the entire situation. Specs frowned as he watched him leave, wondering if he’d done something wrong. Even if he was too confused to love someone yet, he still didn’t want to hurt Tucker’s feelings. He wouldn’t have been adverse to kissing him, but his best friend’s loyalty was fierce, and he stuck to his morals of being selfless and kind. It was another trait that Specs really admired about him, and he laid down on the sofa feeling somewhat guilty. Guilty for not responding to Tucker’s confession, and guilty for potentially giving him false hope. The truth was that his mind was running wild with thoughts about someone else. The one man that had already blown his emotions out of proportion, and that was possibly the last man in the world that deserved his affection.

Lawrence.


	9. Tough Decisions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hi there everyone! It is my absolute favourite time of the year, Halloween! So I’m gonna do an extra special chapter here with some little facts thrown in! Happy Halloween everybody, I will definitely be binging on horror movies today haha! Please enjoy this chapter!

The next morning, Specs woke up with clarity for the first time in weeks. It was Halloween, and with the veil between dimensions being at it’s thinnest, it was a good day to strike in their investigation. It meant that they risked seeing multiple spirits when Elise was in The Further, but they didn’t have a choice. The cleansing effect had now worn off, and Specs was fully aware that the spirit would be searching for him. Slipping into his suit, Specs padded across the hallway and knocked for Tucker, who emerged eating a toffee apple.

“Hey. What’s up?” Tucker asked curiously.

“We have to speak to Elise. Lawrence said that I was in danger, and we don’t have much time. Meet me in the van as soon possible, okay?” Specs made his way outside, calling Elise as he climbed into the van. Although they hadn’t arranged a precise date and time to help Lawrence yet, he knew it needed to be soon and Elise agreed with him as he spoke to her. She sounded slightly angry on the phone, but as Specs hung up he vowed to speak to her when they arrived. Tucker soon dressed and lumbered out to the van, holding masses of chocolate.

“Are you seriously going to eat all of that?” Specs frowned as he started the engine.

“It’s Halloween, we have to deal with creepy shit all year, today is the one day I can feast on candy with a cause.” Tucker grinned and continued unwrapping various chocolate bars. Specs smirked a little then started driving towards Lawrence’s house, wondering if they would make in time.

Lawrence was sitting on his sofa, trembling madly. The spirit hadn’t been present for a little while, but he knew it would return. He could only think about Specs, wondering if he’d see him again and whether he really was Adam. Perhaps his fragmented memories were wrong, or the story was incomplete. Either way, he wasn’t expecting a knock at the door and felt surprised when he opened it to find Elise, Tucker and Specs standing there.

“Oh, hello. This is unexpected….”

“I’m sorry for bursting in on you like this, Doctor Gordon. But Steven told us there was some potential danger so we thought it best to investigate again now?” Elise smiled softly, entering with Tucker as Lawrence allowed them inside. Specs stood on the porch and scratched the back of his head as he looked at him.

“Hey…”

“It’s…..good to see you again. Does Elise know what I told you?” Lawrence lowered his voice.

“No. I was going to ask her, I still can’t remember everything…”

“She asked me not to tell you……so I don’t think that’s a good idea…”

“Are you two coming in or not?” Elise suddenly called out, startling both of them. Lawrence beckoned Specs inside and shut the door. Specs stared at him, slightly irritated by his admission.

“I have to ask her, Lawrence. I don’t know my identity anymore.”

“She’ll be mad at me, you know. Then we’ll both be in trouble.”

“Do you regret leaving me to die?” Specs lowered his voice even more, before finding himself pinned against a wall with Lawrence’s hand over his mouth.

“Keep your voice down! You know I regret that….”

“Then let me understand……I need my memories back. Elise will help me.” He pushed Lawrence’s hand away, and the two of them stood in very close proximity for a few seconds. Specs moved his thumb over Lawrence’s cheek, tracing the scar that had healed. Lawrence rested his hand on Specs’ head and stroked his hair. Specs felt a knot in his stomach again, and looked down shyly as his hand dropped back down to his side.

“Come on. We need to go.” Specs said quietly, pulling away from him as he joined Elise and Tucker in the living room. Lawrence sighed and followed, gingerly sitting on the sofa as he watched Specs smile at his adoptive mother.

“Elise? I need to ask you something…” Specs breached the subject and saw her head raise expectantly.

“Yes dear?”

“I need to know….if I’m Specs. I know about the bathroom….and I keep having these memo-“ Specs was interrupted by Elise grabbing Lawrence’s collar, in a fit of rage neither Specs nor Tucker had ever seen before.

“YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! I TOLD YOU NOT TO!” Elise screamed at him, whilst Tucker pulled her away, avoiding her flailing arms. Specs frowned and stood in front of her, full of concern.

“Elise, what the hell? This isn’t like you…” Specs flinched as Elise put her hands on his face, her anger still evident.

“Steven my darling…..you can’t trust anything that…bastard says. He just wants to hurt you, he’s already hurt you so much…”

“I know that but….you have to let me know who I really am…..I keep having memories that don’t make any sense…”

“I suppressed your memories to protect you, you were so damaged that I had to! That’s why you can’t understand…..there are pieces of your soul in The Further….I’m so sorry Steven…” Specs pulled away from her as he felt his heart racing again. Elise had lied to him, pretended that he was someone else. He wasn’t even sure that she was telling the truth, and looked at her sadly.

“I have to get them back. Did you lie to me about everything? My name, my family? Was any of it real?”

“I lied because I love you. I heard you, in the bathroom. You were between this world and The Further, dying of starvation and dehydration. Jill and Amanda helped me free you, and they never told anyone. But you were so delirious…..you hit the doctors in the hospital and lashed out. I lied to protect you from the man that did to you! TO PROTECT YOU FROM HIM!” She pointed at Lawrence, still restrained by Tucker.

“YOU’RE THE ONLY DEMON HERE, LAWRENCE! HOW COULD YOU LEAVE ADAM TO DIE A HORRIFIC DEATH?! IT’S YOUR FUCKING FAULT!” Tucker held her tightly, still drinking in all of the information that he’d never known about his best friend. Specs gasped lightly, Elise’s outburst finally making sense of one memory. The memory of being restrained in hospital, of shouting one clear name until his throat shredded. Elise was right, and Specs felt the same painful betrayal he’d felt so many years ago. He turned to Lawrence, shaking his head.

“You don’t feel guilty at all, do you….” Specs looked down as Tucker dragged Elise out of the room to calm her down. Lawrence stood up and reached out for wrist.

“Adam…”

“You didn’t know about that, huh? I was in that hospital for weeks. I screamed at anyone who came close. I was a wreck….all because of you…”

“Adam, I wanted to save you. But I couldn’t! I didn’t know where you were! I was a wreck too…”

“Why didn’t you try harder! If Elise hadn’t saved me…..” Specs took his glasses off and wiped his eyes, unable to stop the tears streaming down his face. Despite his memories still lost in The Further, he could still feel the physical pain of being alone for days. The smell of the bathroom flooded through his nose, and his throat felt dry and scratchy. Sniffling, he jumped madly as he Lawrence wrapped his arms around him, holding his head. He fought against him, punching his chest angrily.

“Sssh, shh. It’s okay. Hurt me, I won’t stop you. I just need you to know that I’m here now, and I won’t leave you again.” Lawrence whispered lightly in his ear, still feeling punches against his chest. The hits started getting weaker, and Specs sobbed dismally into his shirt. He clung to him, crying in anguish. In that one moment, with Lawrence’s arms firmly around him, he understood what it felt like to be Adam. A fragment of his soul had returned, and all he could do was sob the pain away against pressed cotton.

“I-I’m so sorry Adam….” Lawrence said shakily, knowing that he was about to cry too. Elise had been so terrifying in her anger, and even though she was only one room away from them, he never wanted to let go of Adam. Feeling the shorter man cease his crying, Lawrence moved to tilt his head upwards. The last thing he remembered was seeing Adam’s eyes, shrouded in tears and red raw. Then the darkness returned, and he fell to the floor, fitting until the world faded away.

Adam shrieked, dropping the floor as soon as Lawrence closed his eyes. He could hear a low, evil laugh from the corner of the room, and as he looked up he gasped.

“Hello Adam. You don’t know me, but I know you. And I’ve come to take Lawrence, after all he did leave you to die. You don’t owe him anything, Adam. So don’t stand in my way, and we won’t have a problem. Deal?” The spirit had fully manifested, a dark shadow now turned into the form of a man. He held out his hand, expectant for Adam’s answer. The spirit was someone Lawrence knew only too well, and someone Adam had never seen before. The spirit, was Mark Hoffman. Still staring at his outstretched hand, Adam considered quietly to himself.

_Do I leave Lawrence to die, like he left me to die?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Should Adam join Mark? Or save Lawrence? Let me know :) Also yes, I know there's hella heaven and hell imagery here, like Lawrence being God and Mark being the Devil, that was intentional haha :D


	10. Another life, Another time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! I had a lot of Uni stuff to finish, so I'm sorry this update took so long! Adam's memories will also continue in the next chapter, please enjoy!
> 
> Also major spoilers for Insidious 3 and 4 here so if you haven't seen those, don't read unless you wanna be spoiled!
> 
> Love to you all! <3

If Mark had known Adam better, or if Adam had known the full extent of the lengths Mark was willing to go to in order to gain full power, perhaps he would’ve hesitated. Perhaps he would’ve stared further into the abyss, and shake the hand of the entity. But Adam’s soul was pure, and even though the fragments were floating in The Further, he knew that he could never be responsible for another’s death. Not as Specs, not as Adam. His eyes met with the snarling beast, and his hands clasped Lawrence’s.

“I don’t make deals with demons.” Adam growled back at the spirit, and cast his eyes to the kitchen. He knew Elise was still angry, but he had to do something. He yelled for her, staring down at the motionless man. Lawrence’s eyes were flickering slightly, and his skin was pale and freezing. He was fading in and out of consciousness again, and Mark simply laughing as Elise and Tucker rushed inside.

“You’ll never save him in time.” Mark warned lightly, before he vanished back into thin air. Elise and Tucker hurried over to the floor, kneeling over Lawrence.

“Elise……please. You can’t let him die! I know you’re angry but…..he doesn’t deserve this.” Adam pleaded, reaching out to pull her sleeve. Elise looked at his teary eyes, his sadness plunging straight into her heart. No matter how erratic her emotions became, she knew deep down that Adam was right. She’d be risking everything, but the urge to use her gift for good was too overwhelming to ignore. Adam was pleading with her, begging her to save another lost soul. Nodding slightly, Adam and Tucker lifted Lawrence onto the sofa and stared at her for further instruction. She sat in the arm chair, sighing deeply.

“Tucker, get the metronome. We’ll need it.” Tucker nodded and ran to the van, bringing back every scrap of equipment, just in case. Adam went to grab his notebook, but Elise shook her head curtly.

“My dear, you won’t be recording this conversation. It’s you that must enter The Further, this time.”

“But…..But I can’t! I don’t have that ability!”

“Sweetheart, you’re already there. At least, part of you. In order to save Lawrence, you have to go and get him. But you’ll need the rest of your memories, and they can only be reached if you go. I can’t get them for you.” Elise seated Adam in a chair and sighed deeply, cupping his face.

“If you go……you’ll remember everything. I suppressed those memories, to keep you safe. But if you go back…….you’ll be whole. Every excruciating memory will surface, and your life as you know it will change. Steven, please think carefully. Is it worth bringing yourself 30 years worth of pain?” Adam bit his lip slightly, staring at the sofa. Lawrence was slipping away, and every second wasted was a second closer to Mark succeeding.

“Elise, I have to do this. I’ve never felt right, like I was missing a part of myself. Now I know why. I have to get through the pain, it’s not just me anymore. I have to help Lawrence. He’s innocent in all this.” Adam stared straight ahead, focusing on a point on the wall as Tucker brought the metronome to the table. Elise nodded and flicked the needle, beginning the hypnosis.

_Into The Further we go._

Adam was unsure of astral projection in the early days of Elise’s teachings. It was fitting, that The Further had decided to throw him into this doubtful period of time first. As he picked up a lantern, he gazed down at himself. He was wearing a Spectral Sightings t-shirt, and he could see a house in front of him. It was Elise’s house, and this was not the first time he’d been here. Entering through the red door, he overheard the sound of crying. Stepping cautiously into the threshold, he saw Elise in her youth, cradling a tiny baby in a blue bonnet.

“Hey, it’s okay my darling. Shhh. Here, it’s okay Steven.” Elise started to rock the baby around the room, and Adam narrowed his eyes as he watched them. Elise had never spoken of a child, but he felt a strong connection to the baby as he walked over to delve deeper into the memory. The baby looked up at him, his eyes big and full of tears. He had huge blue orbs, staring earnestly up at him. Then the baby threw a rattle at him, the object just soaring straight through his transparent body. This particular memory was of Elise’s first and only biological child, and it was her deepest secret. Adam only knew about it, because it was Elise’s guilt over their similar blue eyes that had caused her to gift Adam with the new name, Steven. This became apparent when Adam blinked and the memory warped into a funeral, with Elise weeping at Steven’s grave. Judging by the headstone, little baby Steven had only lived a few months, and Adam felt an unbearable pull on his heart for his adoptive mother. He rested his hand on Elise’s shoulder as she cried dismally, even though she couldn’t feel it, it triggered another memory.

Adam was beginning to collect all of the pieces that made his life complete. His journey through the dark dimension had shown him his birth mother, adoptive mother and his childhood. Most of it was insignificant, and he didn’t linger for too long. Specifically, he didn’t linger when the memory of his ex-girlfriend Nessie started yelling at him. There was a large amount of anger in his life that he’d never known, or at least he’d suppressed. He had to thank Elise for wiping that, but now it was all flooding back in a horrible torrent. The lantern in his hand flickered, and he wasn’t sure of it’s meaning. Perhaps he was getting closer to Lawrence, or perhaps his memories were almost whole. As he deliberated, a new memory unravelled as he stepped into another room, apparent that the journey wasn’t over yet, and Lawrence was still trapped somewhere.

Whilst the first few steps had been light and easy to understand, Adam raised his eyebrows as his clothes changed again, and he was wearing his usual white shirt and tie. As he reached up to his face, the lantern crashed to the ground and his light-up glasses were perched on his nose.

“Tucker?” He called out suddenly, recognising the surroundings as the first room he and Tucker conducted their first fake investigation in. Memories were leaking into one another, and he wasn’t Adam anymore. This was a titbit from his life as Steven, and he couldn’t help but sigh out in relief. Something about the atmosphere was comforting, and he watched carefully as Tucker hugged his memory self. They’d made such a convincing blog, and people believed that they could actually see and remove spirits. So much so that they were panicked when they received the call to help Quinn Brenner, but they duly followed and met Elise in doing so. Adam blinked as he watched the memories start to increase in speed, and he soon found himself stepping into a filthy bathroom, feeling a strange sense of remembrance.

In the corner of the room, Lawrence’s soul was shackled to a pipe, the chain around his ankle eerily familiar as Adam went towards him, kneeling next to him with his eyebrows furrowed.

“Lawrence….”

“Adam? What the hell are you doing here?! It’s far too dangerous!”

“I came to save you……and….to get my memories back….”

“Do you remember now…..the bathroom I told you about?” Lawrence asked.

“Yes. I……murdered someone, didn’t I?” Adam peered over at Zepp’s corpse, still visible in The Further, but his soul was in another dimension. Having already murdered Ted Garza, Adam wasn’t horrified by a different murder, but each time he’d believed he was doing the right thing. That was what he intended to do again, as he broke the chain around Lawrence’s leg.

“Adam you can’t stay here! He’ll kill you!”

“Then let’s go.” Adam was about to hoist Lawrence up and offer him a shoulder, when he froze at the sound of dark laughter by the door.

“Going somewhere, boys?”

**Author's Note:**

> Comments or Kudos mean the absolute world to me! :) <3


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